Just Doing
Work.
Be.
Think.
Do.
No plans, just show up. Quiet the story in my head. No one else is thinking about this.
It is safe spot.
"Just Do"
8" x 10"
Oil Acrylic Pastel Graphite on Canvas
Available Here
Two Months to See
Yesterday I posted about struggling with clarity. Last night I dreamt I was called into a room of specialists who had finally figured out what was wrong. It was serious.
I only had two months to see. My vision would be completely gone in a matter of weeks. I had to decide if I wanted to make the best art with the vision I still had or start figuring out how to paint without it.
It was so real and terrifying.
Perspective.
Also a good lesson for artists.
Invisible Woman
8" x 10"
Acrylic Oil Graphite on Canvas
Exercise in Futility
I want to emphasize the fact that we all have the same experience and the same concern, but the artist must know exactly what the experience is. He must pursue the truth relentlessly. Once he sees this fact his feet are on the path. If you want to know the truth you will know it. The manipulation of materials in an artwork is a result of this state of mind. The artist works by awareness of his own state of mind.
-Agnes Martin
I want to crush the reactive pace that keeps my feet off the path.
"Get things done in order to get other things done," is not serving my summer schedule well. Prioritizing time and intensity is scary. I'm afraid of the worst monster I can imagine. The one that screams, "It's not worth it."
I'm feeling the lack of clarity more acutely as I take the time to focus on it; like shining a headlight on fog.
Also PMS.
Save me today Agnes Martin. I can't slow down. I need to slow down.
Exercise in Futility
9" x 12"
Acrylic, Graphite, Pastels on Paper
"Roots"
10" x 10"
Oil Acrylic Graphite on Canvas
Chip and Grind
I grind my teeth when I sleep. I chip at my ego to work. I mine my head for ideas and calcium day and night.
If I stop grinding will I ever sleep?
If I stop chipping will I ever work?
I need to relax but I'm afraid of it; afraid of the creamy swirl of country comforts, middle age, farmer's markets, and sunset date nights, where I'll disappear.
Old ways are not serving me anymore. I've hit bedrock. I'm tired. I need a sunset date night.
I don't know how to be 45 and I have about 6 weeks to learn. My older friends will say I'm still young, my younger friends will stay I'm not that old. I feel a major transition though. No affirming meme with a grey-haired model will help.
I need to bite down on the unknown root, suck the medicinal bitterness from it and hope it does not poison me.
Artist Residency in Motherhood
This blog is part of my Artist Residency in Motherhood (June 16 - August 30 2016). The work I'm doing this summer includes improving my studio space, extended studio time and business focus. In order to support this effort, I have created a store and appreciate all direct sales.
I am also happy to report new relationships with retail stores and galleries which I will be featuring here this summer. If you are interested in wholesale purchases or showing my work, please contact me directly.
"A self-directed, open-source artist residency to empower
and inspire artists who are also mothers."
